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The Self-Actualization Choice Processing is the first legitimate curriculum for learning positive self-esteem. This is because of a failure to establish a definition that is true, valid and can be processed into an internal learning system. The using of a competitive model that results in a minority “winner” and a majority of “losers” and relies on an external inter-action rather than a personal internal one available to the general population is not an appropriate positive self-esteem learning curriculum.

First, despite a degree of enculturation that accepts Pavlov’s dog stimulus response experiments, human beings are not animals. Pavlov’s experiments, in the late 1800s, are based on external stimuli and acts established by hard wiring of the animal’s brain. Human beings make choices, which by definition can differ from human being to human being with respect to the same or similar circumstances.

The unique human reflective conscious system, with its concomitant meta- cognition tool, differentiated humanity from animals for all time. As a part of this differentiation is the fact that human choices are not pre-wired inborn directives.

The next consideration in reaching the conclusion that the primary human Need is control by an individual over their own living is the self-actualization characterization first pointed to by Dr. Abraham Maslow in his work in the 1950s. The mind construct for the self-actualization (self-empowering) choice making process begins with Dr. Maslow. His main emphasis was on a hierarchy of human choice making factors that first listed human physiological needs, including food, sexual expression, and shelter, then moving on to psychological needs. He was caught up in bifurcated view of human over-hanging animal derived traits. He gave no emphasis to the human reflective consciousness and its implications.

As an aside in his work, Dr. Maslow references several people who he represents as being self-actualized. He looked at self-actualization as a living quality of these few people rather than a choice making process. He viewed his self-actualized people as representing the highest level of humanity because they made their choices being conscious that they were in control of their living. They made their choices conscious of their self-responsibility for them.  He failed to realize that the characteristics of the choices being made by his chosen few could be isolated and learned by everyone.

Dr. Maslow failed to realize that choice making based on an animal act hierarchy that blends into limited selfish psychological human needs was an enculturated idea. He failed to realize that much of his choice making hierarchy was in fact not vertical but horizontal and that much of “history” was written by those attached to groups of folks connected with concentrations of power termed “empires”.

Historical representations from the Greek Empire, the Persian Empire, the Roman Empire, the Ottoman Empire and the British Empire did not include the living of the majority of people, who simply desired that their families live in peace and security. There is a failure in these historical representations to show the empathy by most of humanity in assisting others in peril at the risk of their own well-being. In current history we have overwhelming examples of human beings with full knowledge of possible harmful consequences. The only real benefits to humanity from these empires were the unintended consequences of trade and the expansion of knowledge among the conquered people.

Because Dr. Maslow looked at the person he perceived as being self-actualized rather than their choice processing and how they came to it, he overlooked the fact that they had learned it. It is a learned process.

Self-actualization is the conscious making of a choice with full appreciation of consequences and acceptance of responsibility for the choice. Implicit within this definition is knowledge of the choice maker that their choice making is an internal process and that the processing requires an inter-acting with circumstances – not the reacting to stimulus forming the basis for animal acts.

After Dr. Maslow, there are a number of folks recognizing the human internal processing of human choice making. Additionally, there has been general recognition of human beings making choices based on human feelings.

In further support of the self-actualized choice making process including several feeling needs is the work that appeared a couple of decades after Dr. Maslow. It is the clinical and educational work of Dr. William Glasser. Dr. Glasser’s work validates the inside-out, inter-active nature of human choice making. Dr. Glasser, in his “Choice Theory,” research offered the example of a choice being made when confronted by the threat of deadly violence – being threatened with physical force. Even under these circumstances there is still a choice to be made over which the choice maker has control. The choice maker controls their choice but not the consequences of the choice. Out of this choice theory explanation, Dr. Glasser presents four human needs that require satisfaction through choice making. All four of the needs are mind needs. The common thread of the four psychological needs IS THE NEED OF A HUMAN BEING TO HAVE CONTROL OVER THEIR OWN LIVING.

Jesus’ learnings represent that human existence is consistent with the high level of human choice making identified with self-actualization. When he asks that a human being love others as they love themselves, it is clear that he is saying humanity is capable of the high level of self-feeling required to empathize the feelings of love of others. Without love of self, there cannot be love of others. Another consequence of human empathy is that a human being who experiences self-love is not capable of consciously harming others. The advent of Jesus’ learnings and the careful nurturing of their seed to the present day is a singularly important happening in human history.

As already explored, a self-feeling emotional posture isn’t a constant. Levels of self-feeling in an individual can, from time to time, express some variance. For example; harm directed to someone’s loved one, such as threatened use of a gun, might result in an expression of fear resulting in an illusory choice. Because of the human capacity to possibly express differing behaviors Jesus says that “he who is without sin should throw the first stone”. Sin during the European Middle Ages was interpreted to mean missing the mark. Every human being can and usually will from time to time miss the mark, although for many, there is no public notoriety. Learning the self-actualized choice making approach provides a path to reduce the occurring of illusory type choices.

Shakespeare recognizes the importance of self-feeling and its relationship to truth telling when he puts the words into one of his characters, “If thou tell the truth to yourself, then you cannot be false to any man.” A lack of positive self-feeling often results in the rationalization of an illusory basis for lying. Rationalization cannot make a fact a lie or a lie a fact.

Choices on the lower end of the emotional posture continuum generally are illusory expressions of control over their own living. The lack of positive self-esteem results in efforts to control things outside of themselves, including human beings. The attempts to control others have characteristics such as angering, jealousy, bullying and as already mentioned, political, economic and social position. These expressions involve physical and psychological pressure and abuse.  Dr. Glasser’s research and experience resulted in his adding the “ing” to the fear-oriented impulses such as angering, jealousing, guilting and others. Dr. Glasser recognizes that although there are instinctual impulses, experiencing them and the degree to which they are experienced involves a degree of choice.

Trying to control others is an effort to deny them their natural primary Need of having control over their own living. Resolving inter-actions by a mutuality of recognition by each party to meet each party’s primary Need, is a win-win, adhering to the Golden Rule.  Failure to recognize this mutuality is an expression, as are all of the Fear oriented impulse actions of a competitive, winner – loser – model. Only those lacking in positive self-feeling rationalize against the Golden Rule as being an unrealistic effort.

Another characteristic of illusory low self-esteem expression is the effort to surround themselves with indicia of external superiority such as excessive wealth and a show-off spouse for the purpose of trying to achieve adulation of others. Adulation is an external illusory substitute for a lack of internal strength.

Other common characteristics of low self-esteem include not accepting responsibility for choices with a concomitant tendency to assign blame for failed choices to others and projecting their own failed errors in judgement to others. Such thinking also affects feelings of empathy – reducing the humanity on both sides.

When the preponderance of a human being’s living is dedicated to creating an illusory feeling of control over their own living, their emotional posture can be visualized as resulting in a chronological age that continuously increases at a faster rate than their emotional age. This results in a construct of the possibility of one person having a younger emotional posture than their chronological age. For example, a sixty-year-old individual making choices as though they are sixteen. A person having positive self-esteem might have an emotional age that keeps pace with the chronological or even exceeds it.

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